Love Wins.

It's a love/hate thing

2010-10-04T09:32:00.007-04:00

Reality and I have a love/hate relationship. We always have, and I suppose we always will. I love Reality for the most part. But there are days when I really don't. There are days when he is nasty. He loves to taunt me. Sometimes he looks me square in the eye and punches me in the gut. That's what he did this weekend. Reality knocked the wind out of me.

Here's what I mean. My girls. They are growing up. They are becoming beautiful, strong, intelligent women. And that is all good, and exactly what I want for them. Sometimes it's just hard to believe. In my mind they will always be my babies.

This weekend was Homecoming in Houghton Lake.

Here's Chloe and her friends in the parade:

Tessa was voted the sophomore representative for the homecoming court.

Brent and I had the honor of walking her on the field at halftime.

Grandpa & Grandma even came.

This is Tessa with her good friend Ricky, who was also the sophomore representative.

The next night was the homecoming dance. Reality hit me hard again.
(Chloe with her bestfriends Alexa and Leah)

Tessa with her date Brendan, one of her good friends from downstate.

I don't know if I will ever get over the feeling of "how and when did this happen?" when I look at my girls. But that's okay. I know Reality is right there, just waiting to remind me.

I'm back.....maybe

2010-10-04T08:04:00.002-04:00

I recently read through this old blog. My old blog. I was looking for a specific picture and ended up reading every post. It's been a long time. And it made me realize something. I need to start this again. Not for anyone else. Just for me. It's easy for me to get intimidated by other bloggers that are actually good at it. Great writing and great pictures. I must get past this. I will get past this. My girls are growing up and will be gone before I know it. So, here I go....

Christmas

2008-12-28T09:59:00.004-05:00

Here are a few pictures of our Christmas this year. Of course, it starts the night before with opening new pajamas.

The big surprise this year was for Brooklyn. She asked for her first ipod. With the other girls, they had to save up half the money and then I paid the other half. So Brooklyn decided to ask for money for Christmas. And that was the plan. Until I went online and found an incredible deal on a nano that also plays movies. So two weeks before Christmas I bought it and put one of her two favorite movies on it: "Elf." Then I schemed as to how to really surprise her. Christmas Eve it came to me. I asked Tessa what Brooklyn's least favorite dvd is that we own. She carefully looked through them and then grabbed "Little Lord Fauntleroy." It was perfect. I taped her ipod into it. The next morning it's the last gift under the tree. She obviously knows it's a dvd before she opens it. She rips it open. The next few moments are priceless. You can see on her face that she is trying desperately to not be rude.

She looks at it carefully, and with the slightest disappointment in her voice says, "We already have this one." To which I reply, "Oh....well, that's okay I guess, since you like it so much." I wish I could have had Kelle there to take the second by second pictures of her face. She was precious. Not wanting to hurt my feelings. I couldn't take it any longer and say, "Why don't you open it and make sure that's what's really in it." And here is the face that I'd been waiting for:

I love making memories like that! Then we sat around the table with Grandma Ena's homemade cinnamon rolls and a sweet sausage and egg dish that Brent made. (Egg's from the YikChick of course!) It was a great day. Relaxing, and full of laughter. And we ended it around the table again with Brent's roast beast. Roast lamb and a venison roast that had been in the crock pot since the night before.

We sat around the table long after our stomachs were full, just enjoying each other. Reminiscing about the past and dreaming about the future. Life is different as these amazing girls grow. I thought I would be really sad to have a Christmas without any "real" toys under the tree. But somehow life just keeps getting better and better.

Creativity

2008-11-12T07:53:00.014-05:00

Our new house is technically not ours. We are leasing it until our old house finally sells. Because of this I have not been able to paint the white walls or remove any of the "oh-so-not-me" wallpaper. I don't know why, but not being able to do this for some reason kept me from doing anything creative. It's been almost a year, and I've been feeling the "need" creeping it's way to the surface.

So I've had this idea brewing in my mind for several weeks. It has occupied my thoughts all day and awakened me at night. What I didn't realize was how following through with this idea would change me. Make me happy. Almost like a weight had been taken off my shoulders. Renewed. Fresh.

Painting whimsical/funky mugs and "what-nots" and posting them on Etsy. (If you don't know Etsy, it's a website very similar to Ebay, but it is only for handmade items.) It is so fun!! I know I won't become financially independent this way, but that's not why I'm doing it. I'm just letting the "need" free. I'm a better person because of it.

Here's the logo that my amazingly talented Yaya, Diane, created:

She also made the banner for the shop. I only have a few things listed right now. More coming soon. http://www.cuppajo.etsy.com/

Goodbye City Life!

2008-11-03T11:51:00.005-05:00

Yet another great perk of country life: burning leaves!! In the city we just raked them all into the street and the city would come scoop them up. Very convenient, but just not as fun as burning them ourselves.

Tessa would have no part in this experience, though. She was disgusted with us because we were "killing the ozone layer."

Brooklyn, on the other hand, couldn't get enough.

Notice the bucket of water by the tree. ha!

Halloween 2008

2008-11-03T11:43:00.004-05:00

Tessa's cell group from church decided to do their own trunk for Trunk or Treat. Their theme was Disney Princesses. Tessa was Aurora, aka: Sleeping Beauty.

And Brooklyn was a football player! Here she is looking very fierce. ha! She and cousin Chase also did a trunk together, but somehow I didn't get a picture of it. Bad mom.

Goodbye City Life!

2008-09-24T19:01:00.005-04:00

My Yaya Cousin gave me this great idea of starting this new regular blog title. I've blogged a few times about how much I am loving country life, but I email about it even more. My email friends are probably getting sick hearing about the elk and turkeys and other fun things we're experiencing. But today was a different experience. As much I as I want to be a true country girl, I'm afraid I have a long way to go.

Just after I got done writing an email about how much I love country life (eleven turkeys crossed the road today while I was out running!) I went into the kitchen to pick up a little and hear something in my garbage!!

I freaked, ran out of the kitchen and called Brent's sister, the true country girl. She offered to come over and save me from impending doom. I slowly came to my senses, carried the garbage to the garage, carefully but quickly took out the bag and threw it into the dumpster. whew! And after all that I'm not sure there was anything there to begin with. I never heard it again. Who knows. But now I'm so jumpy, the wind blew in through the window, my paint chips moved, and I about wet my pants!

things that make me go, "ahhh...."

2008-09-24T07:23:00.008-04:00

Carin took these awesome pictures of the girls. I love them!! I'm keeping my eye out for cheap, big frames that I can put them in with a big mat. But for now, these are frames I already had and I painted them black.

Our freshly painted front door.

Paint chips!! Don't you just love paint chips?! We're getting closer to the point of finally painting our house. Even the girls have mentioned being tired of the whiteness on every wall. (Refer back to first two photos.) I get giddy just thinking about it!!

Esperanza

2008-09-15T05:56:00.006-04:00

Once in a great while you come across someone exceptional. extraordinary. sensational. incredible. A few months ago a friend saw her on David Letterman and sent me the youtube link to watch. Normally I don't really care for the musical guests on Letterman's show. But knowing this friend, knowing her taste, and knowing that she knows me, I was eager to watch and listen, knowing I would not be disappointed. But what I didn't know was that I would be entranced. She was amazing. I immediately started searching on youtube for more. I couldn't get enough.

So you can imagine my reaction when I read on her website that she was going to be performing at the Detroit International Jazz Festival over Labor Day weekend. We went together, my friend and me. We got there early and sat in the front row. We watched her and her band set up.

And we listend through her soundcheck.

She is such an amazing talent, this petite, beautiful girl.

If you've never heard Esperanza, you must search her on youtube, and go to her website http://www.esperanzaspalding.com/

I couldn't resist taking this picture.

Be on the lookout for this one. She's sure to be a household name someday. Go buy her disc!

Quiet Morning

2008-09-13T08:23:00.003-04:00

I'm up early on a Saturday morning, which means I'm up alone. It's dark and quiet, except for the rain. I love the sound of rain. And remember several posts ago I took this picture of the elk farm near my house? Well, ever since we've moved here, several of our neighbors have told us about the elk bugle. It's a mating sound they make in the fall. I've been waiting months for this experience, and this morning it happened. I couldn't place it at first. It is a strange sound that can't really be described. But I remember the girl next door telling me they sound kind of like whales. And that is what I heard. Amazing.

Loving life in the country.

Cousin Visit!

2008-07-28T09:50:00.004-04:00

Last week Carin came to town for a photo shoot so she and the girls stayed with us. I even talked her into letting the girls stay an extra night. (It really took some convincing! ha!) Lisa came over for a while and we sat in the backyard catching up and waiting for the sunset,

while the girls played and then settled in for a movie.

The next morning we had blueberry pancakes!

They played some Twister Dance.

Then outside to catch little frogs in the grass. Somer loved the fact that Tessa is deathly afraid of frogs and made a point to chase her around the yard with this little guy.

Then some soccer in the back yard. Girls vs. Brent.

The second night they all slept in the basement and watched movies.

Oops, but first we went to Lisa's house and made s'mores!! Yum!

A great time was had by all. I'll never get tired of watching these girls together. They get along so well and love each other so much. These are memories they will have with them forever.

Yet Another Milestone!

2008-07-23T08:43:00.005-04:00

Anyone that has kids knows that life becomes full of milestones. When they are very young, it's almost a daily experience. I remember her first smile, first word, first tooth, her first steps, how she would always say the word ball backwards, her squeals of joy when she heard the theme song for "The Muppet Shlow," her made-up word "yestertime," her first big fall, her first day of school, her first piano lesson. Obviously, I could go on and on. Well, they aren't daily in our house anymore, but they still happen. And no matter how much I mentally prepare myself, they still seem to catch me offguard.

My Yaya Cousin

2008-07-23T08:19:00.002-04:00

I once again had the joy of soaking up Touching Bass. This is an experience of which I will never tire. She has always been an extremely talented musician. Anyone who has ever known her knows this. But she's been slowly morphing into something way beyond "musician." She has become an artist. Putting it all out there. Her inner being exposed and shared through her music. Beautiful.

I'm proud and inspired. I love you, my yaya cousin.

Cross One Off My Bucket List!!

2008-07-22T20:02:00.005-04:00

I finally did it. Something I've wanted to do for several years. Last Saturday I ran my first 10k. Be warned, the following pictures are scary! But I did it and I felt great when I finished. I downloaded the pics backwards. The first one is right after I crossed the finish line, and the second is coming in to the finish. I found a training schedule online and have been diligently following it for the last eight weeks. And now I'm hooked. I can honestly say I enjoy running. And even more, I love how it makes me feel. Can't wait to do another!

Maybe a half marathon next year? Hmmmm..............

Oh, and that trophy? I bet you are all really impressed that I got 3rd place in my age group, aren't' you?!! I hate to disappoint, but there were only three runners!! haha!! But hey, I'll take the trophy anyway!

Romantic Getaway

2008-06-25T17:25:00.009-04:00

Brent and I were able to get away the past few days. He had a conference up at Crystal Mountain Resort, and I tagged along. It was SO relaxing. Our anniversary was last week, so we decided to take advantage of this conference and call it an anniversary celebration, too. 19 years! I don't know where the time has gone. Marriage is a strange ride. For the most part it's a fun excursion with minor bumps along the way. Once in awhile there are major derailings, but with lots of hard work, perseverance, and more love than anyone knew exited, we somehow find our way back on track. I'm glad we've stuck to it, and stuck to each other. There isn't anyone else that I would rather share my ride.

Here are a few pictures of where we stayed. This first one is the club house.

This is our suite.

I fell in love with this tile table.

This was a really fun pool. It was loaded with kids, so we just layed in the chaise chairs and read for a couple hours. Bliss.
Now it's back to reality. But I love my reality. Great kids, great house, and 19 years with my best friend. Love really does win.

Perfection DOES Exist

2008-06-12T07:59:00.005-04:00

"They" say that it doesn't, but I have proof that it does. And it grows in my very own backyard.

"God has sewn His name on the Heavens in glittering stars; but on earth He planteth His name by tender flowers." -Jean Paul Ritcher

Have you ever...

2008-06-05T10:27:00.011-04:00

...met someone and immediately thought, "Wow! That's a person I'd really like to get to know better." Honestly, it rarely happens to me, but it happened last year. I met this amazing and beautiful woman, and just had this "feeling" that if given the chance we could become great friends. And after meeting her husband it was almost too good to be true. Could it be we had found a couple that both Brent and I could be friends with? Last night we were able to have them and their daughters over for dinner. They are truly an amazing family. On Saturday they will be leaving for Ethiopia to bring home their newly adopted sons. We're still in the "getting to know you" stage of friendship, but each time I'm around her I have a very safe feeling. So here is a picture of our friends, Tony and Anne.

And their smart and beautiful daughters, Hannah and Abby.
Thanks for a great night!

things that make me go, "ahhhh"

2008-06-05T09:54:00.009-04:00

Fresh nutmeg. I've been putting it in everything from coffee to pancake batter. Yum!

This picture speaks for itself. If you haven't tried this, you MUST!

This last one may seem really gross, but to me it doesn't get much better than a sweaty shirt after a run. I feel like Rocky Balboa running up those steps in Philidelphia when I come inside after running and look in the mirror. The sweatier the better!

Wanted: MoJo

2008-06-03T07:42:00.003-04:00

So I haven't posted in over a month. I was just starting to feel the groove of this thing called blogging, when......poof! I don't know how or why, it was just gone. So I decided I just need to sit and do it anyway.

Last night was a fun night for our family. Well, really it was just a fun night for me. The girls had been dreading it for months. Piano recital night! Recitals are so much more fun as a mom than they were as a kid. Just one of the perks of being a grownup, I guess. ha! I don't know if it's possible to convert my video recorder to digital, but if it is I will post little snippets. Here is a picture of the girls with their amazing teacher, Mrs. Heydenburg.

Oh, and did I mention that since my last post, my middle girl became a teenager! I have two of them now! I don't know how it has happened so fast. She also passed Chloe and me in height. I'm still getting used to the idea that my kids are growing up. Some days it's really fun, and other days I wish I could put them in footie pajamas and cuddle again. But I'm thankful every day for the amazing young women they are becoming.

Being a Better Mom

2008-04-30T09:33:00.005-04:00

I recently heard a story about Dr. Jane Goodall's mother when Jane was a little girl. I can't stop thinking about it. It's haunting me; like when I saw that bumper sticker that simply said, "Love wins." Am I this kind of mom? Honestly? No. I want to be. I need to be. My girls need me to be.

When Dr. Goodall was five years old her mother came into her room to tuck her into bed for the night. She saw that Jane had also tucked some worms into bed with her. Her mother's response is amazing. What would I have done? Flipped. "What are you thinking?! Get these things out of your bed and out of my house!" But Mrs. Goodall had no knee-jerk reaction. She calmly explained to her tender-hearted daughter that if the worms stayed with her they would die. They needed to be in their own environment to live. That had a profound impact on that little girl that she never forgot.

So today I'm vowing to be more conscious of my girls intentions and motivations. No more knee-jerk reactions. Well, fewer anyway.

(Okay, I just realized that the title and the picture are pretty funny together. ha! I didn't intend it that way!)

My Mom

2008-04-11T07:35:00.003-04:00

Today is my mom's birthday. It's hard to believe that she has been gone almost 10 years. They say that time heals all wounds. It's not true. Time can never heal the wound of losing a parent. I think about her and miss her everyday. This is one of my favorite pictures of us together:

I think about how proud she would be of my girls. I picture her sitting in my living room listening to Chloe play the piano and being so proud that she has learned to play "correctly." (Not self-taught like her. She was a very good piano player, but it always bothered her that she could play better by ear than by reading music.) I picture her sitting at the kitchen table sharing coffee with Tessa and just listening and understanding. They had a very unusual bond. Mom totally "got" Tessa's temperment and could communicate with her like no one else could. I picture her sitting on Brooklyn's bed at bedtime, choking back tears as she listened to her tender heart. (A special gift that I'm sure she got from Grandma.)

Here is another favorite picture. This one is in the garden that Brent made for her. It was taken on my dad's last birthday with her. We lost her just eight months later.

Happy Birthday, Mom. I love you.

My Love/Hate Relationship

2008-04-09T21:21:00.007-04:00

Running. After a several month hiatus, I hit the road this week. I knew it would be tough after such a long break, but.......tough does not begin to describe it. Here's a picture of me beginning my first run:

And here is a picture of me the following day:

Today I thought I'd try again and decided to take my camera along to help motivate me. After years of walking and running through the city park, running in the country is a whole new experience. And I love it. Here are a few pictures:

I've always loved barns. This one doesn't have the faded, peeling paint I always picture in my mind when I think of barns, but I still love it. It was just built this winter by some Amish men.

And here are my favorite reasons for running in the country near my house:

The elk!! Aren't they beautiful?! We drive by them almost everyday, but to be right there on the road, so close to them was breath taking. Our neighbors tell us that we will hear them "bugle" later this summer. How cool!

So that was today's running experience. I'm anxious to really get back at it and get back to where I was in the fall. Supposedly I'm doing a 5k in May. We'll see.

A Surprise for Dad

2008-04-02T11:07:00.002-04:00

Today I happened upon an amazing sight. Tessa and Brooklyn voluntarily cleaning their bathroom. And when I say, "cleaning" I don't mean the obligatory wiping-the-counter-around-all-the-stuff-they-leave-out kind of cleaning. I mean really cleaning. Take a look.

After I picked myself up off the floor, they explained that they were doing it to impress their dad. Keeping things picked up and clean does not come naturally for them. They know how much it bothers him, and they wanted to surprise him while he was away to a meeting. Did I mention that they are on spring break? These are truly amazing girls.

B. Dorothy

2008-03-28T19:57:00.002-04:00

She started complaining about headaches when she would read. Then she didn't want to read at all because of it. So......you guessed it. My baby got glasses! And they look so great on her. The styles and colors to choose from are so fun. She chose these all by herself. It's hard to tell in the picture, but the outer color is rasberry, and the outer edges and the inside color is teal. Very fashionable! (Kell, notice her necklace?)

My Nooks

2008-03-28T18:31:00.005-04:00

This post is for Carin. :-)

I couldn't choose just one favorite nook, so I thought I'd show you a few. This first one is grandma's chair (my favorite chair) in the corner of my front room. I love to sit in the sun with my cup of tea and just gaze out at the yard and field in back. It's my corner of serenity.

This next one is my bed. Brent and I call our room "the sanctuary." This is where I go when I need to get away from the noise and chaos of life with kids. (Notice Ed in the window. He was there the whole time I made the bed and took the picture.)

Then there's my reading/computer chair. We originally bought this chair for Brent, but it didn't take long to become mine. ha! This is where I connect with you guys!

This last one may seem strange to most of you, but like I said at the beginning, this post is for Carin. Since having you and your family stay with us, my laundry room has become a sentimental nook. This is where we ended up before finally going to bed late at night. This is where we shared our hearts. Now every time I am in here I picture you sitting on top of the washer, all curled up in Chloe's robe, talking with me. Just because.

So these are my nooks. Little places that make life a little sweeter.

things that make me go, "ahhhh"

2008-03-21T10:51:00.006-04:00

The collection of family pictures on top of our piano. Even though it's nowhere near complete, (an ongoing project!) it makes me happy to look at it.

Burt's Bees lip shimmer

Fresh highlights for spring!

Ed

2008-03-20T10:54:00.005-04:00

Ed is our cardinal. He has been a resident of our address longer than we have. When we first moved in, I kept hearing this sound that I could not figure out. First it was in the dining room, then later in the master bedroom, then again in the sunroom. I finally realized it was a bird repeatedly banging into the windows. Over and over. Flying from one window to the next. When my husband saw this he joked that this cardinal must be special ed. My youngest picked up on this immediately and named him Ed. So now we have a "pet" cardinal named Ed. I've tried to get pictures of this strange behavior, but I'm not exactly a trained photographer. Here are a few from the window in our bedroom.

And he is not easily scared away. I can walk in and out of the room, and he just watches me. These next two are the best I could get of the banging.

I've become strangely attached to Ed. We bought him one of those bird feeders with the suction cups and stuck it to the dining room window. He will often come and eat with us. I'll have to try and get a picture of that, too. Oh, and we named his "wife" Edna. ha!

Signs of Spring

2008-03-13T09:08:00.004-04:00

March in Michigan is exciting and frustrating at the same time. Days go back and forth between winter and spring with no warning. Yesterday I decided to take some pics of tangible signs of spring to help convince me that it really is coming.

Here are some mystery flowers growing by my front walk. Since this is our first spring in this house, I have no idea what we have. Any guesses?

Then in my backyard I found this little guy! I don't know how he'll survive. Maybe he'll be dinner for the robins I've seen but couldn't get a picture of.

And then my final and most pungent sign of spring: the truck fulls of manure that were delivered to the field behind our house!! Now if that doesn't say spring is on it's way, nothing does! ha!

I'm going to love living in the country!!

And They're Off!!

2008-03-10T18:22:00.003-04:00

Braces, that is. Here is the first picture of Tessa's $5,000 smile.
She's been waiting for this day since March of 2006!

Dollars for Darfur

2008-03-08T17:21:00.000-05:00

My oldest is the co-president of the National Junior Honor Society at her middle school. For a fundraiser in February, they organized a school-wide Penny War with all the money going to Darfur. I'm not sure they knew what they were getting into, but I'm proud of them all the same. Yesterday a bunch of kids brought over all the jugs from the classrooms to start counting all the coinage. Yowza! What a job!

If you don't know what a Penny War is I'll try to explain it. Each homeroom class collects as many pennies as possible. But to sabotage other classes, you can put in other forms of money,

and that amount is subtracted from their pennies. So if you put a quarter in another classroom's jug, then 25 pennies are subtracted from their total. It's a really great way for the kids to get excited about raising money.

But as you can see, it's quite a job to count it all. Wanna come over and help?

The Title

2008-03-07T20:55:00.000-05:00

So I thought I'd start by explaining my title, "Love wins." I saw it several months ago. I was driving down the road following the same van for several minutes before I noticed it. It was the most unassuming, yet powerful bumper sticker I had ever seen. It was probably only 4 inches long. Very small for a bumper sticker. And that's all it said. Love wins. I just stared it and it was like everything suddenly became clear. It wasn't Love Won, or Love Will Win. But Love Wins. A constant. Those two words say everything. Love wins. Love wins. I love those words. No matter what, Love wins. Always.

Well, Here We Go.....

2008-03-06T12:50:00.000-05:00

After much pushing and prodding, mostly by Kelle, I've finally decided to try this "blogging" thing. I've loved reading blogs, but have always been intimidated by the creativity and savvy words of others to think that I should ever attempt it. So this is my own personal challenge - stepping out my comfort zone, not being concerned with it being "worthy," just doing it. So here it goes. Thanks for the push, Kell!!